Movie Baywatch (2017)

20171013:
It's been a month now since I've seen this film and I don't remember my first impressions of it. With that being said, I'd summarize the movie as follows: Baywatch was a mix of muscle, bouncing boobs, and ridiculous.

[20171110]

Instant Comments:
"Original unedited format" | "Since scenes not objectionable have been taken out, viewer discretion advised." | "Formatted to fit."
Lol. Overdramatized rescue.
"Are you Batman?"
"Big dick."
Ha. Pamela Anderson and David Hasselhoff.
Priyanka Chopra.
Lol. Mumbles.
Ha. "Not a single fuck was given."
Lol. Dialogue is ridiculous and nonstop.
Ha. That camera angle during the Heimlich Maneuver.
And then with the boner.
Lol. Katy Perry's Roar.
Lol. All the "technically."
Haha. Coed shower.
Ha! "Sounds like a farfetched tv show."
Nice green dress.
Lol. That distraction.
Hebrew school.
"Check his taint."
Lol. He almost covered his track, but her phone... Lol.
High-pitched balls. Ha.
References Breaking Bad.
His tone sounds like he's from... I don't know. Zoolander?
Yeah that's not fair. He was blackmailed with his probation.
Haha. David Hasselhoff on the other side.
Lol. The Baywatch theme.
"Ronnie, I need your help. Because as much as I know about laptops, I don't know shit about computers."
Ha. Ronnie finishes and Brody says "Heck yeah!" Ronnie says under his breath, "Thank God, you're pretty."
Haha. Die. "Is anyone going to die? I don't know. Maybe Ronnie."
Ha! "...and that he needs to meet us at the marina at 0900." "0900 is 9:00 a.m., so 9:00 p.m. would be 2100." "That system is so stupid and flawed."
References Jason Bourne.
Lol, that kiss.
Lol, that twist. (Mitch was actually the one who rescues Brody)

Watched 20171013 (in-flight entertainment)
Baywatch (2017) Seth Gordon. 116 min

Relevant Links:
Baywatch (IMDb.com)
Baywatch (RottenTomatoes.com)
Baywatch (film) (Wikipedia.org)

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